Today is one of those days that I simply need to reboot and start over. I need to empty my head and start fresh. Literally.
This morning started out with Lexi's sonogram appointment. Although I have every faith it will produce normal results, as a mother of a 6 year old daughter going through all of this, I am stressed to the max. I am worried about her and just want her to feel good and like a "normal kiddo".
Now, with all that has gone on with her and myself, my Papa is thrown in the mix. A few weeks ago they thought he was trying to have a heart-attack, while on a trip out of town. But the test results showed no signs of actual "attack" occuring. So after 48 hours in the hospital he was released and allowed to travel back home. He made an appointment with his local physician who referred him to a cardiologist in Amarillo, which in turn did a stress test and other testing on him. The stress test came back normal, but we found out last night that the visual exam, not so normal. So ... with that said we are now praying that the heart cath he will be having in December will produce normal results, or at least answers that we can then use to make decisions for repair and a fast recovery.
So ... with all that is going on I just wanna scream ... but my new motto is, "When in doubt. Twirl." I am going to learn to use my stress and direct it towards "twirling". Literally. One of my favorite quotes from a movie, Dazed and Confused, is "I just wanna dance". Well, I'm going to dance through all of this stress and mental mumbo-jumbo that Satan is throwing at my family. My kids twirl all the time instead of standing still. It makes them giggle. I'm going to use the same method as an adult. I'm going to giggle and twirl!
So ... good luck to all of you trying to commit me when you see me in the grocery store twirling in front of the canned veggies or the milk. It isn't shopping ... it is retail therapy. It isn't craziness ... it is de-stressed twirling.
And for those of you being fantastic prayer warriors for all that I am going through. I love each of you for being my brothers and sisters in Christ. Thank you a million times over!!!